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Musicians Who Care Too Much: How You Play Better by Not Caring

I’ve started digging into Kenny Werner’s “Effortless Mastery” a bit. So far, it’s nothing short of intriguing. I’ve hit the 4th chapter, “Beyond Limited Goals”. All of a sudden I found myself taking out a pen and a piece of paper, for some notes. Why not keep the notes on the blog, I thought to myself.

In this chapter, Kenny Werner emphasizes on one aspect: surrender the obsessive need to sound good!

How does one achieve that level of musicianship — of humanness? How does one evolve into a riveting presence so worthy of praise? Limited goals, such as trying to impress people, find security, play “valid” jazz, and so on, block that goal. Surrender is that key, and the first thing to surrender is one of your most prized possessions: YOUR OBSESSIVE NEED TO SOUND GOOD! This is a paradox that most people can prove through their own experience.

Personal Experience

I totally agree with what he has to say:

When you don’t try as hard to be good, you play better.

From personal experience, I can relate this to so many instances. First of all, let’s look at the “not caring part”. When I practice on my own, there isn’t any fear. I play, I practice, and I feel good (mostly) about what I do. Now… I can relate to countless instances where I started caring about the way I sounded, the way I was playing, and choked!

Let’s look back at the 2005 Byng Arts Recital, for example, where I completely bombed. Haha… back in the days, way back in the days when I had no clue about jazz, I wanted to sound like a certain elevator-music-playing soprano saxophone player. Despite how much I sucked back in the days (I’m still not that great now, though slightly better, in my opinion ), I practiced hard for the recital with a newbie saxophone player’s lower-lip-biting ambitions. Long story short, there was way too much ego, and I wanted to sound good desparately! I cared so much about the performance… cared so much about everything… that I completely bombed and choked.

I’m sure everyone can relate to these types of experiences. Take the playing tests in the school music program, for example (Lord Byng has an excellent music program, by the way, by far the best in Vancouver and the lower mainland). I used to get really nervous when it was my turn to play. Remember, Werner says that we need to surrender ourselves and not try as hard to sound good. I remember sounding a lot worse than usual in these playing tests when I cared too much… every time.

• By not caring, you play better.

• The harder you try, the worse you play.

An Involuntary Muscle

It sure is easy to think about not caring the way you sound now, but when the time comes to your solo, what’s going to happen? Werner puts it this way:

Like an involuntary muscle, this concern just happens even as one approaches one’s instrument. No matter how much people are intellectually aware, they will not be able to control their concern once they start to play.

What’s the solution?

… if a true acceptance of oneself — if not actual love — is present, the fear of failure will be gone!

Self-acceptance is the key here. In my opinion, it’s about how comfortable and at ease you feel with yourself.

Finally, among other things, Werner says that music is not suppose to be a “source of depression”, but rather a “gift”. By letting all the tension go, you’re able to look at music from a totally different approach.

In Conclusion…

A person who is not afraid to die, knows how to live. A person who is not afraid to fail, succeeds. And a person who is not afraid to sound terrible may sound great.

Until next time! (Who cares? )