Although music is commonly regarded as a gift… many suffer great pain and fear in attempting to play it. Some of play as if there were a gun being held to our head, and there usually is — because we’re holding it!
What? It’s true!
Oh, you know what I’m talking about. The awkward — and sometime painful — posture, wrinkled-up foreheads, reddened, suffocating faces. I — I’m sure you have, too — see it all the time. And to be completely honest here, I’ve gone through it all, to the extent that I was physically hurting myself.
I’m a saxophone player. In my case, it was the tense, awkwardly painful posture that hurt my wrist and fingers, the fear embedded deep within that wrinkled up my forehead, and the fear — of course, we can’t take any credits away from the ego — that really, really messed me up as a musician.
In “Effortless Mastery”, Kenny Werner puts it this way:
Why is this so? As stated before, many of us have formed an unhealthy linkage between who we are and how we play. We fear being inadequate and that leads to ineffective playing, practising, and listening. Fear closes all doors to the true self, that brilliant center where the ecstasy lies.
I know, there’s a little bit of cheese in that passage. But if we’ll really open our eyes and look at it, fear does close all doors. Werner describes the musical experience as “feeling more exquisite than the sweetest nectar the world has to offer”. However, fear allows no of that to happen.
Recognizing the Fear
Apart from what’s mentioned above, how else do we recognize fear when we play? Simply put it this way: anything one does that isn’t completely organic and natural (we’ll talk about this part later when we get to the meditative aspect of thing — yup, believe me, it gets crazy!) comes from fear.
Ah ha! That’s why the first thing we talked about, in our previous post, was about giving up the need to sound good. What’s there to fear if every note we play is the most beautiful note we have ever heard?
Where Does Fear Originate?
Where does fear originate? From the mind? Yes, but not the “universal mind,” or the “over mind,” or the “collective unconscious.” Rather, fear originates in our “little mind.” One may call that little mind the ego.
Whoohoo! Here we go. The ego. The “I” mentality. It is the:
lens through which we perceive our separateness from each other. Separateness invites comparison and competition. This is where problems originate: he’s younger than I, more talented, and so forth.
Ego kills! Ego draws in negativity to music. Fear comes from the ego. Afraid of sounding bad? Ego. Afraid the player beside you plays better? Ego. Get my point?
For now, the first step we should take is to loose the ego. Do not be afraid to sound bad. Who’s got to say that’s “good”, “bad”, “ugly”, or “pure”? Loose the ego and let yourself come through. The player beside you who plays better is sharing his/her music. Great! Enjoy it! Appreciate it! Be a part of it. Loose the separateness and gain a sense of unity.
Tyrannized by our egos, we live in a state the Hindus call maya, or delusion. Engrossed in maya, we can’t see the magnificence of who we really are. We think we need so much. Desires multiply, and we know nothing of real inner happiness. Fear sabotages us at every turn.
Fear-Based Playing
Fears causes us to loose touch with ourselves and “ignore the ideas that want to come naturally.” Werner says that fear of sounding bad — what we discussed in the previous post — “robs the music of all its strength”.
In fear, we expect; with love, we accept.
That’s it for today. Next time: Fear-based pratising!
17.Apr.08 
Effortless Music 
Comments (9)
I’ve started digging into Kenny Werner’s “Effortless Mastery” a bit. So far, it’s nothing short of intriguing. I’ve hit the 4th chapter, “Beyond Limited Goals”. All of a sudden I found myself taking out a pen and a piece of paper, for some notes. Why not keep the notes on the blog, I thought to myself.
In this chapter, Kenny Werner emphasizes on one aspect: surrender the obsessive need to sound good!
How does one achieve that level of musicianship — of humanness? How does one evolve into a riveting presence so worthy of praise? Limited goals, such as trying to impress people, find security, play “valid” jazz, and so on, block that goal. Surrender is that key, and the first thing to surrender is one of your most prized possessions: YOUR OBSESSIVE NEED TO SOUND GOOD! This is a paradox that most people can prove through their own experience.
Personal Experience
I totally agree with what he has to say:
When you don’t try as hard to be good, you play better.
From personal experience, I can relate this to so many instances. First of all, let’s look at the “not caring part”. When I practice on my own, there isn’t any fear. I play, I practice, and I feel good (mostly) about what I do. Now… I can relate to countless instances where I started caring about the way I sounded, the way I was playing, and choked!
Let’s look back at the 2005 Byng Arts Recital, for example, where I completely bombed. Haha… back in the days, way back in the days when I had no clue about jazz, I wanted to sound like a certain elevator-music-playing soprano saxophone player. Despite how much I sucked back in the days (I’m still not that great now, though slightly better, in my opinion 
), I practiced hard for the recital with a newbie saxophone player’s lower-lip-biting ambitions. Long story short, there was way too much ego, and I wanted to sound good desparately! I cared so much about the performance… cared so much about everything… that I completely bombed and choked.
I’m sure everyone can relate to these types of experiences. Take the playing tests in the school music program, for example (Lord Byng has an excellent music program, by the way, by far the best in Vancouver and the lower mainland). I used to get really nervous when it was my turn to play. Remember, Werner says that we need to surrender ourselves and not try as hard to sound good. I remember sounding a lot worse than usual in these playing tests when I cared too much… every time.
- By not caring, you play better.
- The harder you try, the worse you play.
An Involuntary Muscle
It sure is easy to think about not caring the way you sound now, but when the time comes to your solo, what’s going to happen? Werner puts it this way:
Like an involuntary muscle, this concern just happens even as one approaches one’s instrument. No matter how much people are intellectually aware, they will not be able to control their concern once they start to play.
What’s the solution?
… if a true acceptance of oneself — if not actual love — is present, the fear of failure will be gone!
Self-acceptance is the key here. In my opinion, it’s about how comfortable and at ease you feel with yourself.
Finally, among other things, Werner says that music is not suppose to be a “source of depression”, but rather a “gift”. By letting all the tension go, you’re able to look at music from a totally different approach.
In Conclusion…
A person who is not afraid to die, knows how to live. A person who is not afraid to fail, succeeds. And a person who is not afraid to sound terrible may sound great.
Until next time! (Who cares? )
20.Mar.08 Effortless Music Comments (9)
The concept of “effortless mastery” can be a tricky one. This concept, in my opinion, not only applies to music, but to everything in life. Today, I borrowed a well-used (pages falling out, binding wrinkling…etc.) copy of “Effortless Mastery” from Stan Karp, and plan on reading through it. A little bit of info on the back of the book:
Kenny Werner is an accomplished pianist who began performing at age 4 and, by age 11, has appeared on television. While at the Manhattan School of Music he became restless with his musical direction and began to explore Jazz as new means of creativity and expression. Along his journey, he was inspired by masters of the craft to rethink not only the technical aspects of creativity, but also the spiritual aspects. Effortless Mastery, is not only an account of that journey, but also an insightful guide for all those wishing to remove their own barriers to creativity in life and the arts. While Mr. Werner happens to be a musician, the concepts presented here are applicable to every profession, aspiration or life-style where there is a need for free-flowing, effortless thinking.
Let’s flip open the dictionary and look up some definitions:
Effortless:
- Requiring or apparently requiring no effort; “the swallows glided in an effortless way through the busy air”
- Casual: not showing effort or strain; “a difficult feat performed with casual mastery”; “careless grace”
Mastery:
- Possession of consummate skill
- Great skillfulness and knowledge of some subject or activity
Effortless Mastery?
“…if you’ve constantly pointed to other players and thought that they possessed something you didn’t, or if you’ve practiced for years and never really improved, or if you always play great but your music lacks depth and meaning for you, read on.”
Yes sir , I will read on — read on and share the “enlightening” moments (cheesy choice of words there) with my readers.
Stay tuned!
12.Mar.08 Effortless Music Comments (8)
Just to give you an idea of my collection:
They’re now all uploaded with streaming capabilities (yes, gigabytes of free, quality jazz at your service) and can be played at the snap of a finger anytime, anywhere.
I’ll keep the collection going and hopefully no one sues me (I did mention that the music’s for educational purposes?), since after all, I have 300 Gb + of disk space thanks to my host, Host Monster.
Ooo.. back to topic. The complete collection’s located right here:
http://www.eastwoodzhao.com/music
Once I get my hands on some more tunes, I’ll share them! But remember, this is for educational purposes only! :O
20.Oct.07 Effortless Music Comments (0)
One of the special features of jazz music is the articulation that the various players use in expressing themselves through their music. Some players enjoy using the standard swing style articulation very common to the Swing and Bebop eras, others use little articulation relying on legato or slurred phrases, some use staccato in their playing to add interest or emphasize certain notes or phrases.Most all players eventually arrive at a style of articulation that is suitable for expressing themselves. Young players often struggle with getting the various muscles to respond at the precise time the fingers touch the keys, be it saxophone, trumpet, piano, guitar or whatever. Think of articulation as proper enunciation. No one enjoys listening to a speaker or a musician who cannot properly or effectively get his message across because his mind is not coordinated with his voice, lips, fingers, breath, etc.
I found an excellent e-book that deals with jazz articulations on the saxophone. Click here to view it.
24.Jun.07 Effortless Music Comment (1)
